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Why did the leprechaun run for president?
He wanted to bring a pot of gold to every home!
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What do you call a fake stone in Ireland?
A sham-rock!
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Why don't leprechauns play hide and seek?
Because they're always hiding their gold!
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How does a leprechaun write a letter?
With a green pen!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite type of music?
Folk music—especially jigs!
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Why did the Irishman wear green on St. Patrick's Day?
So he wouldn't get pinched by a leprechaun!
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What do you call a leprechaun who loves to tell jokes?
A pun-ny little fella!
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Why did the rainbow go to therapy?
It had too many emotional ups and downs!
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What do you give a leprechaun on his birthday?
A sham-rock and a roll!
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How does a leprechaun answer the phone?
“Green-ings!”
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Why did the corned beef and cabbage break up?
Too much brisket-tual tension!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite dance?
The Irish jig—it's full of hops!
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Why don't leprechauns ever get lost?
They always follow the rainbow!
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What do you call a leprechaun who's a musician?
A sham-rock star!
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How does a leprechaun style his hair?
With a pot of gel-d!
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Why did the Irishman stop eating corned beef?
He wanted to keep his sanity!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite game?
Hide the gold—he never loses!
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Why did the rainbow refuse to share?
It was feeling a bit seltzer-splashed!
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How do leprechauns communicate?
By sham-rock signals!
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What do you call a leprechaun who tells tall tales?
A fib-rachun!
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Why did the Irish baker get fired?
He kept putting too much yeast in the soda bread!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite snack?
Goldfish crackers!
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Why do leprechauns never win at poker?
They always fold their luck!
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How did the leprechaun propose?
With a sham-rock ring!
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What do you call a leprechaun who's always late?
A slow-poke-achun!
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Why did the Irish soccer team wear green?
So they could blend in with the grass!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite holiday?
St. Patrick's Day—he gets the day off from hiding!
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Why was the leprechaun so good at math?
He always counted his gold!
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What do you call a leprechaun who can't stop talking?
A gabb-er-achun!
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How does a leprechaun keep his cool?
He stays under a four-leaf clover!
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Why did the rainbow become a singer?
It had a colorful voice!
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What do you call a leprechaun who loves to garden?
A sham-rock farmer!
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Why don't leprechauns drink coffee?
They prefer green tea!
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How does a leprechaun stay in shape?
He does pot-of-gold squats!
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What did the leprechaun say to the rainbow?
“You're a color-ful character!”
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Why did the Irishman take a ladder to the pub?
He heard the beer was on the house!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite TV show?
“The Walking Debt” (he's always counting gold)!
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Why did the leprechaun go to school?
To get his gold-star education!
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What do you call a leprechaun who's a detective?
A clue-rachun!
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Why did the rainbow get a ticket?
It was caught running a red light!
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How does a leprechaun order at a restaurant?
“I'll have the pot of gold-fish, please.”
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Why don't leprechauns use smartphones?
They prefer to stay off the grid—and on the rainbow!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite sport?
Sham-rock climbing!
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Why did the Irishman bring string to the parade?
To tie up some loose ends!
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How do leprechauns organize a party?
They send out gold-engraved invitations!
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What do you call a leprechaun who's always borrowing money?
A lepre-crunch!
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Why did the rainbow go to the doctor?
It had a bad case of the blues!
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What's a leprechaun's favorite dessert?
Sham-rock candy!
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Why was the leprechaun so happy?
He found a four-leaf clover in his beard!
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How does a leprechaun say goodbye?
“Stay lucky, me friend!”