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Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
Because he wanted to go to high school!
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What did the little corn say to the mama corn?
“Where is pop corn?”
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Why don't kids ever tell secrets on a farm?
Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!
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How does a kid stop a cold from spreading?
He catches it!
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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
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What do kids call a boomerang that won't come back?
A stick.
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Why did the kid put his money in the freezer?
He wanted cold hard cash!
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What does a kid use to fix a broken tomato?
Tomato paste!
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Why did the kid tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!
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What did the kid say when he saw a sign that said “Thin Ice Ahead”?
“That's okay, I'm on a diet.”
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Why did the kid eat his homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How do kids make their beds?
They use a blanket statement!
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What did the little tree say to the big tree?
“Leaf me alone!”
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Why did the kid cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
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What do you call a kid who doesn't tell lies?
A little fibber!
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Why did the kid put a frog in his sister's bed?
Because he couldn't find a spider!
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What did the kid say when his mom asked if he brushed his teeth?
“I brushed them, but I forgot to brush my tongue.”
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Why don't kids eat clowns?
Because they taste funny!
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What do kids call a crying baby?
A little boo-hoo!
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Why did the kid bring a magnet to school?
He wanted to attract attention!
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What did the kid do when he saw a broken robot?
He cried because his bot was down!
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Why did the kid put a carrot in his ear?
Because he wanted to see if he could hear his vegetables!
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What do kids say when they're stuck in a sandbox?
“Help, I'm in a jam!”
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Why did the kid bring a pillow to the dinner table?
He wanted to sleep on his food!
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What does a kid do when he hears a ghost story?
He gets spooked!
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Why did the kid put his homework in the oven?
Because he wanted a hot answer!
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What do you call a kid who loves math?
A number one fan!
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Why did the kid hide under the table?
Because his mother said he was a little spoiled!
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What does a kid say when he loses his toy?
“I'm toy-tally lost!”
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Why did the kid put his shoes in the fridge?
He wanted to have cool feet!
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What did the kid say when he saw a bee?
“I'm not afraid – I'm bee-hind you!”
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Why did the kid bring a flashlight to bed?
To shed some light on the situation!
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What do kids call a dog that does magic tricks?
A labracadabrador!
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Why did the kid take a ruler to bed?
To find out how long he sleeps!
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What did the kid say when his mom asked him to clean his room?
“I'm not messy, I'm just creatively organized!”
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Why did the kid put a bucket on his head?
Because he wanted to think outside the box!
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What do kids call a sleeping dinosaur?
A dino-snore!
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Why did the kid put a crayon in his pocket?
He wanted to draw a conclusion!
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What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
“Where is pop corn?”
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Why did the kid put a match in the freezer?
He wanted to make cold fire!
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What do kids use to fix a broken pencil?
Pencil-lead glue!
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Why did the kid sit on his homework?
Because the teacher said to sit on it!
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What did the kid say when he saw a scarecrow?
“That's a straw-man argument!”
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Why did the kid bring a net to the playground?
To catch some swings!
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What do kids call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud!
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Why did the kid put his watch in the blender?
He wanted to make time fly!
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What did the kid say when his sister told him to stop acting like a frog?
“Ribbit, ribbit – you can't boss me!”
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Why did the kid eat a dollar bill?
Because it was his lunch money!
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What do kids call a bear that eats fruit?
A berry nice bear!
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Why did the kid put a sponge in his backpack?
He wanted to soak up knowledge!