0
Why did Santa get a ticket?
He left his sleigh in a snow-park zone.
0
What do you call an elf who sings?
A wrapper.
0
Why was the Christmas tree so bad at knitting?
It kept dropping its needles.
0
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted flakes.
0
Why did Rudolph get a bad grade?
He went down in history.
0
What's Santa's favorite type of music?
Wrap.
0
Why are Christmas trees so bad at cards?
They always get spruced.
0
What do you call a cat on Christmas?
Santa Claws.
0
Why did the gingerbread man go to the doctor?
He felt crumby.
0
How does Santa take photos?
With his North Pole-aroid.
0
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman.
0
Why was the Christmas stocking so sad?
It had a hole in its heart.
0
What's the best thing to put into a Christmas pie?
Your teeth.
0
Why did the scarecrow get invited to Christmas dinner?
He was outstanding in his field.
0
What do you call a Christmas tree that can sing?
A caroling tree.
0
Why did Santa go to school?
To improve his elf-esteem.
0
What's a snowman's favorite drink?
Ice tea.
0
Why don't Christmas trees like to play hide and seek?
Because they always get spotted.
0
What do you call an elf who steals?
A kidnapper.
0
Why was the Christmas turkey so polite?
It had good mann-ers.
0
What does Santa use to measure his sleigh?
A yardstick.
0
Why did the Christmas candle get fired?
It was too dim.
0
What do you call a reindeer that tells bad jokes?
A pun-deer.
0
Why was the Christmas present so sad?
It wasn't wrapped.
0
What do you call a Christmas party at the beach?
Sandy Claws.
0
Why did the Christmas tree go to the gym?
To get a little more trunk.
0
What's the difference between a Christmas stocking and a regular sock?
One you hang up for Santa, the other you hang up for good.
0
Why did the snowman look through the carrots?
He was picking his nose.
0
What do you call a Christmas elf who is always late?
Tardy the Elf.
0
Why did Santa get a divorce?
His wife was a real Mrs. Claus-trophobic.
0
What's Santa's favorite dessert?
Yule log.
0
Why was the Christmas angel so sad?
She had harp problems.
0
What do you call a reindeer that can't see?
No idea, but it's probably not Rudolph.
0
Why did the Christmas cookie go to the doctor?
It felt crummy.
0
What do you call a snowman with a carrot?
A snowman.
0
Why did the Christmas tree stop being friends with the menorah?
Too many branches.
0
What's the best way to catch a reindeer?
Up a sleigh-gh.
0
Why did the Christmas ham go to therapy?
It had too many issues.
0
What do you call a Christmas song that's too long?
A carol-icature.
0
Why did Santa's helper quit?
He was fed up with all the elf and safety.
0
What's a snowman's favorite game?
Freeze tag.
0
Why did the Christmas star get a promotion?
It was outstanding.
0
What do you call a Christmas wreath that's always right?
A know-it-wreath.
0
Why did the gingerbread man stop running?
He got baked.
0
What do you call a Christmas tree with a lot of money?
A fortune pine.
0
Why was the Christmas turkey so popular?
It always had a lot of stuffing.
0
What's the best part of Christmas dinner?
The presents.
0
Why did Santa's sleigh break down?
It had a sleigh-tyre.
0
What do you call a reindeer that can't fly?
A walky-walky not a fly-fly.
0
Why did the Christmas elf go to school?
To learn how to make better puns.