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Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
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What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
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Why did the egg hide?
It was a little chicken.
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What does a grape do when it gets stepped on?
Nothing—it just lets out a little wine.
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How do you fix a broken pizza?
With tomato paste.
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Why did the mushroom get invited to every party?
Because he was a fungi.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese.
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Why was the strawberry sad?
Because its parents were in a jam.
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What did the potato say when it got chopped?
I'm feeling diced!
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Why did the banana go to the doctor?
It wasn't peeling well.
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How do you make a milk shake?
Give it a good scare.
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What's a ghost's favorite food?
Boo-berry pie.
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Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because it felt crummy.
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What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blueberry.
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Why did the pizza get a job?
To make some dough.
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What's the best thing to put in a pie?
Your teeth.
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Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill?
It ran out of juice.
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What do you call a bear that loves food?
A grizzly bear—they're always hungry.
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Why did the apple go to school?
To become a smart cookie.
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What do you call a potato with glasses?
A spec-tater.
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Why did the lemon stop at the crosswalk?
It wanted to be a citrus-cross.
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What did the bread say to the butter?
You're on a roll!
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Why did the egg get a promotion?
It was over-easy.
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What do you call a funny peanut?
A jokester nut.
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Why did the onion cry?
Because its relationship was a tear-off.
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What does a slice of pizza say to another slice?
You're looking cheesy today.
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Why did the soup get a ticket?
It was caught broth-ing the speed limit.
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What do you call a sleepy pepper?
A jalapeño—it needs a nap.
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Why did the pancake flip?
Because it saw the butter coming.
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What do you call a lazy sandwich?
A loaf-er.
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Why did the cherry blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
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What's a turkey's favorite dessert?
Gobble-berry pie.
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Why did the spaghetti go to the gym?
To get some pasta-ture.
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What do you call a nervous vegetable?
A shak-oh.
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Why did the muffin go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling crumby.
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What do you call a cow after an earthquake?
A milk shake.
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Why did the bacon get an award?
For being so un-bacon-ably good.
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What do you call a fish that loves food?
A tuna—it's always in a can.
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Why did the popcorn get in trouble?
It was popping off at the mouth.
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What do you call a spicy hamburger?
A patty with a kick.
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Why did the almond go to therapy?
It had too many nut issues.
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What did the chocolate say to the peanut butter?
You complete me.
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Why did the sandwich break up with the salad?
It was tired of being tossed.
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What do you call a cheese that's always happy?
Mozzarella—it's always laughing.
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Why did the avocado refuse to leave?
It was too pit-iful.
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What do you call a fast food worker who sings?
A fry cook with a high note.
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Why did the donut go to the dentist?
To get a filling.
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What do you call a carrot that's a good listener?
A root of empathy.
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Why did the sushi get embarrassed?
Because it saw the wasabi coming.
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What do you call a breakfast that tells jokes?
A pun-cake.
